There are some things I just don't understand about my fellow inmates and one of them is that so many inmates (men and women) love the shows "America's Most Wanted" and "Cops."

Isn't that like rabbits enjoying greyhound racing? I understand that there are a small percentage who think they are awfully cool to be featured on those shows, (I suppose it's the same attention-seeking craving as those who vie to go on the Jerry Springer show and its ilk), but that is not why most inmates watch.

Of course, people get terribly excited when they know someone on one of those shows, but again that is a tiny percentage of the inmate viewers. Why is it that a large percentage of the prison population loves to watch law enforcement catch other criminals?

Do we feel less stupid? They're getting caught too. Or do we feel superior? We handled that particular situation with much more finesse and cunning. Do we feel morally superior? Our crimes pale in comparison with theirs. Or do we feel full of narcissistic pride that our crime was worth going to prison over instead of that rinky-dink foolishess?

I hear so many strange things said about those shows when I ask people, "Why do you watch?" Some of the oddest responses being,"I wanted to be a cop." "I should have been a judge." "If I hadn't screwed around in school, I could have been a good prosecutor."

Most peculiar of all (for me at least) is that the people I am speaking with see no irony in their words. It's as if breaking the law consistently (selling drugs, bad checks, robbery, fraud, etc.) is somehow related to upholding the law. It's as if cops and robbers were first cousins of the same family. I, on the other had, thought cops and robbers were on opposite teams--warriors fighting one another. Apparently, the faithful viewers of "Cops" and "America's Most Wanted" view themselves as co-partners in the business of law enforcement.

Many inmates express this same philosophy in another way:. "Without us they wouldn't have jobs." Oh, so crime is good for the economy? It reminds me of one of the extraordinary things people say about war: it perks up a flagging economy. Of course, if the war is far away and doesn't involve mayhem and destruction in the middle of one's own street it might seem like a fiscal boost. (Ever see what a land looks like after a battle has ravaged it? Nothing perky about it). I, therefore, find it indigestible to accept that we criminals provide an important positive impact on the economy.

Yes, our numbers have created a vast growing prison economy that creates a lot of jobs but that seems such a short sighted view of a nation's economic progress. Doesn't progress imply more than growth? If your child is progressing in school, she's doing more than eating and growing. Progress implies change for the better towards a desired goal. Are the growing national occupations of crime and punishment progress? It sounds remarkable, like the primitive colonial economies of early America and Australia that also ran on the business of criminals.

I still don't understand why inmates watch those shows but I do understand, even though I stongly disagree, why so many believe that their incarceration contributes to economic growth. It's all about the money, they say. I hope not. (Elizabeth Haysom, Fluvanna Review, April 21, 2005)

Elizabeth Haysom is presently incarcerated at the Fluvanna Correctional Center for Women in Troy, Virginia. This column is one of a series, published under the general heading 'Glimpses from Inside.'