Dear Friends,

I would like to share a bit of my current concerns from a psychological standpoint. Events such as these create opportunities both for polarization and hatred as well and sharing and community. It is essential that feelings be expresed, our children's our leaders and our own. It is part of the healing and completion process that normal people go through following trauma and loss. Anger is part of that equation. While it is clear that we all want a response that is commensurate with the actions of our enemies or much greater - to frame our anger as a need to conduct a war is frightening and likely to escalate our emotional vulnerabilities as much as our practical ones.

I have counseled many children and teens who have not slept since Monday because they believe that we are war and about to be invaded. I agree with Sec.Powell's call for thorough investigation and appropriate retaliation. President Theodore Roosevelt suggested that we walk softly and carry a big stick. We have an opportunity as a nation to demonstrate protection for our own without blind and indiscriminate cruelity to others. We often criticise our young people who seem so angry and violent and counsel them to manage their anger and think about consequences. To control OURselves now is to prove that such acts of violence can never be the answer.

Middle Eastern students at my university and even those who are afraid that they look middle eastern are afraid to leave their rooms or be seen in public. Some nights ago, at a vigil with many students, Islamic, Jewish, Christian and other leaders spoke words of faith, and a feeling of community was present. Today, however, around town, many are less accepting of our common roots in humanity. We must take a stand that racism and ostracism of innocents is not a way to achieve our revenge. It is too soon for forgivenss, perhaps, but not too soon to keep from doing things we might regret later.

We are part of the humanity we want to promote in the World and we must model how we would like our children and later generations to act. Especially now when it is so awfully, awfully difficult. Acceptance and appropriate response is not the same as appeasement. If we become out of control as a result of our grief and hurt, we encourage others to respond to us in the same way and we teach or children to do the same.

In the meantime, let's hug each other, remind those who we love how special life is, and reach out to our friends in need. Take care of yourself as well. We are all precious and we can all make a difference.

Much love and respect,

Peter Sheras (electronic mail, September 14, 2001).